love

90 Day Rule

| greylittlemouse

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Even though I’m married, the world of dating never changes. It’s frustrating, boring, fun, exciting and a whole bunch of emotions. Most of the time it can be such a mess to find true love!

I don’t miss the dating world at all. It can be such a headache. I have some friends still fighting the force. It can be a let down or not finding, “the one” that doesn’t want you. Who really does on a few dates? Very little do, and it involves a major connection and respect.

I always told myself and my friends keep a 90 day rule. Treat dating like a job. It really does work.

• When we find a new job, there’s usually a 90 day probation period. If we choose to stay then sign the papers for the benefits. After 90 days, we tend to know if we’re uncomfortable or ready to make a life changing commitment. Just like a relationship. Three months is a long time. After that, and still acting like it’s the 3rd week, then make a move or say goodbye. Don’t wait around till half a year to be no where. What a waste! Move on!

•  If it’s a friend with benefits, which is the worst thing ever since someone will always get hurt. I don’t care how “independent” you are. Please, what a joke we all have feelings. Don’t be a pussy on wheels. Don’t be a service person and drive all hours of the night to accommodate someone. Goes for male and females. Respect yourself and make them work for you. Nothing is open past 2 a.m. except a pair of legs. We all know that! Keeping the friends with benefits for over 90 days, and that relationship is going no where! Next thing you know, “your friend” will be asking to buy your friend a drink or asking to get the scoop on your other friend! Don’t be that person! Move on!!

• Last but not least, if you’re asking for advice more than you like or double guessing yourself…Move On! My friend is always taking breaks from his long term girlfriend and we will meet for lunch and he will vent. One day he asked me, “how did you know you were in love?” I told him straight up, “if you’re asking me this question, you know the answer, and you need to rethink what you want in life or Move On!

What I’ve Learned From Wonder Years

| greylittlemouse

“I never knew until that moment how bad it could hurt to lose something you never really had…”

Cue in the Bob Seger music. Whenever I think of breakups, I picture a lost boy riding on his bike in the sunset eating a hot dog . He’s against the wind…with mustard all over his face.

Ha, from what I remember that was Kevin Arnold. Winnie never knew what she wanted. At least her emotions and dialogue were limited to, “Hi and Kevin go home.” It was not complete without the depressing songs from the Beach Boy’s & Bob Seger in the background. I was “lucky” to have one Kevin moment in my life. I look back and laugh (because it felt like a cheesy t.v. episode ). It was like the quote from the show how we left it,

“Growing up is never easy. You hold on to things that were. You wonder what’s to come. But that night, I think we knew it was time to let go of what had been, and look ahead to what would be. Other days. New days. Days to come. The thing is, we didn’t have to hate each other for getting older. We just had to forgive ourselves…for growing up.”

Then the ex rode off with the beautiful sunshine on his beach cruiser (no hot dog). However, I didn’t play Beach Boy’s, but I did go dancing in the moonlight. It was weight lifted off my shoulders of a dead relationship. It was always a friendship love than true love. What is real love anyway? There is so many ways to actually love anything. I love a clean restroom with toilet paper…

“All our young lives we search for someone to love. Someone who makes us complete. We dance to a song of heartbreak and hope. All the while wondering if somewhere, somehow, there’s someone perfect, who might be searching for us.”

It’s true down the road of bad mixed tapes and playlist’s of lost puppy love’s there is your match. Each relationship I had tested me for the next. They all made me stronger as a person. Winnie Cooper ended up finding her love of art history in Paris to return to Kevin married. Traveling always clears my mind. Put’s me back to reality than make believe, la la land. I’m happy to say I found my happiness and my love. Plus, we love the Beach Boy’s.